Chasing Leaders

10 04 2017

There are plenty of differences in relational styles. Some of us are more verbal and others more auditory and the like. Some are slow responders and others are really quick on their feet. Relational styles even differ on how they like to receive information or requests, e.g., phone calls, text messages, email, Facebook messaging, etc. But when we are leading a group of people and those persons cannot obtain a timely response from us through any of the various means of communication mentioned, then we are requiring those same persons to chase us.

Chasing leaders is not fun. In fact, sometimes it’s downright frustrating and futile. If you’re a leader who needs to be chased, then please, for the sake of the team and the sanity of others, listen up.

No one, I repeat, no one enjoys chasing their leader in order to get things done or make a decision. In fact, if you’re a leader that has to be continually chased, then you’re a leader who does not care as deeply as you should for those whom you lead. If your subordinate or even your supervisor has to call you, text you, email you or send smoke signals repeatedly for a response, then you are in effect dishonoring them by sending the message that your time is more valuable than their time. It conveys that you are too caught up in your world to respond in a timely fashion. Making it difficult to get a response from you slows down efficiency, inhibits order, frustrates relationships and spreads an, “I don’t care attitude” around the workplace.

If you’re this person, here are some suggested changes for you:

  • If providing an accurate response is going to take some extra time, then begin by sending a brief message in return like, “I’ve gotten your request and I will get back to you by the end of the week.” Then, follow through on your word.
  • If you have an administrator type person, ask them to get back to the request to discuss a time to connect.
  • If people are reminding you that they are calling once again, pick up on that, you might have already begun to frustrate them.
  • Maybe you’re the forgetful type. Write down or place a message on your phone to remind yourself to return the call within a certain time frame.
  • Apologize for responding too slowly and make a commitment to the person to respond in a more timely fashion in the future.

Finally, if this speaks to you, confess that you deal with this issue and be accountable to change for the better, because those whom you oversee and those who oversee you are counting on it and integrity in leadership requires it.

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Teaching Your Children to Steal

20 02 2017

imagesSome years ago I was meeting with a young married man for various counseling issues. I really cannot remember what they were, but I do remember one thing from that time. He inadvertently mentioned that he enjoyed “breaking and entering.” I said, “You what?” He shared that for years he and his friends would break into garages and sheds and steal small items simply for, “The thrill of it.”   I shared, “You do know that stealing is against the law, not to mention one of the Ten Commandments, right?”   He assured me that he did, but added that no one has been hurt by his actions and that he enjoyed the dare and the challenge. “Further,” he said, “I find nothing wrong with it.” I added, “But I thought you told me you were a Christian.” He assured me he was.images-4

images-3A counseling plan: During his history statement he shared that he and his wife had a young son who was five years old. I had a plan. I looked straight at him and with boldness said, “I recommend you take your five year-old son along with you and the gang the next time you decide to break into a place.” He said, “What?” “Yea,” I continued, “Take your son, he’s small and you can put him through a window and then he can unlock the door for you to enter.” With a wrinkled face he replied, “I thought you said you were a Christian counselor.” “I am,” I told him. “But here’s the thing…start your son out young and train him thoroughly in thievery so he can be just like his dad.” I went on to say, “In commonality the two of you can have some real father/son bonding time breaking into sheds and garages.” I went on to say, “You’ll be so proud when he becomes just like you!”

He committed all the sins his father had done before him; his heart was not fully devoted to the Lord his God…   (I Kings 15:3)





Redemptive Love – Changing a Life

30 01 2017

Redemption. It means to be repurchased, bought back, atoned for, rescued. It is what Jesus, our Redeemer, does. He came to earth to redeem; to change our lives one soul at a time. While salvation is not fully completed on this earth, it does initiate thatvalentine_day_art redemptive process from the inside out. To know God and to know His love is to live within this ongoing process. To not know Him is to live outside this process.

Four couples and four stories of redemption will be vulnerably shared on February 11th, 2017, at Newport Church in Elm, PA. When you and your spouse or as a single participate in this day, you will hear life-changing testimonies of couples who walked through pain-filled experiences with drugs and alcohol addiction, sexual addiction, financial ruin and the premature death of a spouse and child. You will be challenged by their stories and encouraged by their progressions of healing. And, you will have take-a-ways of redemptive ideas to bring into your relationships.

The day is free with a small charge for lunch and an offering will be taken. Please consider coming. I know you will be blessed. Call 717.627.1996 to register today. You can also view the event details at this link:

https://dcfi.org/resorces/seminars/redemptive-love-couples-day/

 

 

 

 

 





Forgiving One Another

6 09 2016

images-13I know of scarcely anything more difficult, more challenging and more humbling than expressing forgiveness. But at the same time, I know of scarcely anything more freeing than forgiveness. In the Holocaust documentary titled Shoah, a Warsaw ghetto victim states, “If you could lick my heart, it would poison you.” Nothing depicts a non-forgiving heart better than that picture. Author Gary Thomas once wrote, “We will be sinned against, and we will be hurt. When that happens, we will have a choice to make: We can give in to our hurt, resentment, and bitterness, or we can grow as a Christian and learn yet another important lesson on how to forgive.”

images-12Forgiving is not something we naturally love to do. Even though we have been forgiven of so much and have fully come short of God’s ideal, we love to withhold forgiveness simply because (we might tell ourselves) the person has not suffered sufficiently for what they did to us. The truth is, One already suffered so we could be forgiven; we must now make the choice to do likewise (See Colossians 3:13). To do anything less is to take a position of critical judgment, freely giving ourselves over to the use of the evil one in heady, heartless self-righteousness.





What Years of Ministry has Taught Me About Integrity

6 06 2016

imagesIntegrity is a condition we choose to walk in. If we choose not to walk in integrity, we will eventually need intervention in our lives.  The following are examples of life lessons in integrity.

  1. Integrity is God’s choice for me. (I Kings 9:4)

 

  1. Integrity is a choice that I must choose. (Job 27:5,6; Psalm 7:8)

 

  1. Integrity starts in my heart. (I Chronicles 29:17)

 

  1. It is easier to not be a man or woman of integrity. (Job 2:9)

 

  1. It is something that you grow in. (Psalm 103:13,14)

 

  1. Finding a model to emulate is helpful, as well as being that model. (Titus 2:7)

 

  1. It means humbling ourselves when we fail. (Romans 12:3)

 

  1. It means not being able to defend yourself before others at times. (Psalm 25:21; 41:12)

 

  1. Jesus maintained integrity before men who constantly judged him. ( Mark 12:14; Hebrimages-2ews 5: 8, 9; Proverbs 29:10)

 

  1. The closer we come to Jesus, the more integral we become. (Proverbs 2:21; 10:9 NLT; 11:3; 13:6)




The Four P’s

28 09 2015

images-5 Have you ever heard of the four P’s? If not, here they are:

People of risk; Places of risk; Possessions of risk; Processes of risk

Those who are in Christ are called a new creation (II Corinthians 5:17) and in order to fight the forces of our past, God will give us wisdom and insight into how to resist the pull of finding ourself off course.images-6

There once were people in our lives who helped us to sin. I call them people of risk. These were the ones who always knew where the party was. As we are learning to walk a different way, people of risk should be avoided. Further, quite often people of risk are found in places of risk. These are the places that you now realize are places of darkness. We, through the discernment of the Holy Spirit, need to steer clear of these places so as to not be tempted to re-enter our former life, at least until we are strong enough to handle the temptations of that former life style.

images-7Possessions of risk are those items that enabled us to disobey God or at the very least did not draw us toward our Savior. An example of one of those items might be inappropriate books. In the book of Acts, chapter nineteen, the new believers actually conducted a book burning. They burned their possessions of risk. In this case, they were books of sorcery.

The last one is processes of risk. This one is a bit difficult to define, but can you think of a time when God spoke to you and revealed that your present way of thinking was a part of your old mindset? The scriptures reveal that we have been given the mind of Christ (I Corinthians 2:16). So, a process of risk might be a return to anger or jealousy in order to get what you want. The Father wants to give you a new process in order to arrive at what He desires for you.images-2

There you have it, the four P’s. How can they help you walk differently today and when can you share them with another?





18 Ways to Train Children and Teens to be Financially Responsible

21 09 2015

images-31Ever wonder why some people have strong financial skills and others missed that class? For the most part, it’s in the parental training or lack thereof. Some young people never experienced financial training or a good example of responsible stewardship while growing up and others had to discover for themselves the hard way, through loss. There is a better way, however. Take the financial lessons you have learned and use them as a teaching tool to those little ones in your life, either as a parent, a grandparent or a caretaker. Their future teachers and employers will love you for it. Author and financial teacher Larry Burkett once said that we are not responsible for our children’s decisions, but we are responsible for their training. Here are some “training” insights to consider when it comes to handling money:images-30

  1. It all begins and hinges on helping them to understand that God owns it all. We are to be the best stewards of everything He shares with us.
  2. Be generous and teach generosity. There is no greater blessing than to give.
  3. Teach the difference between self-discipline, delayed gratification, and immediate self-gratification along with the direct consequences of each one.
  4. Be an example of all things in moderation vs. excess.

images-275. Give your children regular and meaningful responsibilities – jobs without pay, e.g., picking up their toys.

6. Do not give an unearned, free ride allowance, but rather give your children regular jobs with generous pay, e.g., mowing the lawn or folding the cloths.

7. Teach your children to tithe from every dollar earned or given to them. It is all God’s but discipline in regular giving grows a  habit.images-35

8. Teach your children to save a percentage of their income for the future (30-50%), all the while designating a percentage of what can be spent immediately.

9. Teach the difference between an asset and a liability – a consumable.

10. Train your children to follow through. They must learn to complete the job in the way requested or there is no reward.

11.Help them to understand the concept of investing and how that will help them beyond today into the future.

12.Develop a budget with your child as soon as they can comprehend the idea. It will serve them the remainder of their life.images-34

13. Start a savings account and when age appropriate, obtain a checking account and an ATM card. Teach them how to responsibly use and balance them.

14. Train them in the proper use of credit and how the borrower is servant to the lender.

15. Share with them the difference between paying interest and growing interest on their money/investment.

16. Share with your children your financial mistakes and how they can learn and benefit from them.

17. As is appropriate, walk them through all other financial concepts like loans, taxes, utilities, owning a home, maintenance, buying a car, auto repairs, insurance, etc.

18. And finally, take the time to teach your children what God takes the time to teach you about money and His resources. They’re never too young to learn.








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